Much has happened in the year and a half that I've apparently stopped writing.
Last blog was in December '05? Craziness.
I'm kidding about the "much has happened" part. I'm still at the same job, in the same band, and still frequenting Wendy's. But, there are a few huge things to announce, though most of you know already.
I proposed to Jess on Feb. 12th. And she said yes.
There's a fairly cool story behind the engagement. At least, I thought it was cool.
It was a Monday evening, chosen because of its proximity to Valentine's Day. I knew that Jess would expect something for V-Day, but I hate Valentine's Day. And probably always will. And didn't want to associate "day I ask Jess to marry me" with "day I despise."
Still, the proposal wouldn't have worked at any time other than around the craptastic "holiday" brought to you by Hershey's.
I called Jess at work and asked her to eat a light lunch. She paused on the other end of the line and said "....Okay?" She probably thought I was attempting to cook dinner for her. I learned my lesson from the couple of nights when I made a casserole or some such, and she'd put on this terrible poker face and say "Wow... this is (choke) really good. Thanks for making dinner. No, no... I like it.... (even worse poker face, because she knows I know she's lying). I'd offer seconds, and she'd scream "NO!", as if I asked if she wanted her left arm severed off.
So, no Germ-style meal. I had ordered up sushi (as it turns out, more than either of us could have eaten.....collectively.... in a week), and the kitchen table was completely covered with sushi platters, flanked on either side by a vase holding a dozen roses.
She asked if she could read the card on the flowers. I advised to wait until after dinner.
So, we ate until there were chunks of smoked salmon in our bloodstreams, and she read the card. It said simply "Look in the dryer."
She excitedly threw open the dryer door, and.... no ring. But there was a cheesy Little Mermaid (I was pretty set on Harry Potter, but, as it turns out, The Little Mermaid was perfect) foil-plated Valentine card that second graders give out to one another.
On that card was written "Look under the black towel."
She looked around the laundry room. And said "I don't see a black towel."
I asked where we typically keep the towels.
Off she went to the bathroom. Under there, another Little Mermaid Valentine, sending her off to another room. In all, 58 cards were hidden.... behind refrigerator magnets.... under the television.... on page 102 of this book... in that CD case..... on the last card was written "Will you marry me? If so, check this box."
Though the box remains unchecked, I'm pretty sure she's ready to go through with the marriage thing.
Which is awesome.
More big news in the Bell household.
I'm gearing up for uncle-hood. According to the early checkups, I should have me a nephew in early January. I asked if Jess [sister Jess, not the Jess I'm marrying. I know... it confuses everyone. People will ask me how Jess is, and I have to guess which one they're talking about. Unless they mention "pregnancy," and then I can assume (and hopeohGodhope) that they're talking about my sister] could try to keep pushing him back in and give birth on April 29th, so that we could share a birthday and both be Tauruses... or Tauri? Bulls.... both be bulls... She didn't seem too thrilled with the idea. But, I guess it's cool that the young'un was likely conceived on my birthday. You know the drill... visit to Citizens Bank Park, Schmitter and a couple of beers, afternoon delight.... Unclehood. It was a great game and a beautiful afternoon... I'm surprised that not all of you who came out for the game are expecting the stork to arrive in the early winter. (thanks to all of you for coming out, by the way. I was very surprised... even after seeing Pilling in the stands on the way up. I'm a dunce.)
And, I'll be the second of the sibs to get married. Jamie and Phil are tying the knot this October.
Which brings us to the "something borrowed, something blue" part.
We were up in Frazer, PA tonight getting fitted for tuxedos, and at dinner afterward, Gail was asking Jamie if she had all of the copmponents for the wedding outfit. The something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.
I'm just, in a general sort of way, too lazy to visit wikipedia (or scholarly journals) to find where that whole custom originated. Or why. It's, when you think about it for a couple of seconds, just a really dumb rhyme. It may have been a cooler rhyme at one point, like "something old, something new, something mauve, and Rod Carew," but people were arguing that the mauves were really magentas, and poor Rod was getting stretched thin with having to attend all of those weddings.... especially during baseball season. And so they changed it.
I question these four components of wedding garb. Should the entire outfit be only four parts? What if it's a new dress and new shoes? That isn't something. Those are some things. Doesn't work.
And, if the whole outfit must be made up of those four parts, I sure hope that the something old isn't the underwear. Or, even worse, the something borrowed.
And, what if something can be old and blue and borrowed? Like, if my sister went to the Smurf's village and asked Vanity if she could borrow Papa Smurf for a few hours. Then, could everything else on the outfit be new? And, how do you accessorize with a Smurf, really? I'm sure Tim Gunn would know (oh, over the past year and a half that I've been silent, I've watched more reality TV than anyone should be subjected to. Ever.)
I'm sure I won't be letting another year and a half go by without writing. More stories to tell, but I don't want to blow my "story wad" in one sitting. Because, again, I'm lazy. And I think Top Chef is on.
Love and Pop Tarts,